Gift Suggestions for your Autistic Bestie

Shopping for people can be difficult but autistic people might be the exception since we tend to love our special interests at all ages. This listicle is based on products and services I personally like as an autistic adult and parent of an autistic child. All external links to products in this article are things I actually bought and use and personally recommend.

1. Swag from their Fandom

Every autistic person I know has fallen deeply in love with something. Is it Pokémon like me? Perhaps a video game, book series, or TV show. Depending on your budget, you can get something small like a keychain or something large like a replica object (think a real Master Sword from Zelda crafted by a metalsmith). Wearables from the fandom so your autistic can imagine themselves as part of that universe is a bonus (for example, you can get your Pokémon fanatic a mega evolution necklace or dynamax bracelet).

If you’re going for clothes, make sure they’re tagless and soft. Some of us also may prefer a v-neck or other style because the standard T tends to feel too close to our throats making us feel like we can’t breathe. Also observe your autistic for their preference in sleeve length. Do they wear short sleeves, long sleeves, or 3/4 sleeves? Okay, maybe just steer away from shirts altogether…

2. Sensory Avoidant Gifts

Sensory avoidant gifts help sensory overload by reducing inputs to the person’s senses. Consider all the human senses and get creative with what tools might be available to help dampen them!

1. Eyes (vision): gift ideas might be sunglasses, a sleeping eye mask (but get the 3D kind that bubbles out so your eyelashes don’t touch!), a hat, window clings for their room to darken it, light dimmers, etc.
2. Ears (audition): gift ideas might include active noise-cancelling headphones or earplugs (I hear Loop is becoming popular in the autistic community and I got myself a pair!)
3. Nose (olfaction): is your autistic sensitive to smells? Gift ideas might include rubbish bins with secure lids to contain them, cleaning supplies meant to neutralize smells rather than add to them or replace them, a plastic cutting board instead of a wooden one, or even just a nice, soft scarf to wrap around their face
4. Taste (gustation): this is where comfort foods play a role! Stick to their favorite foods, candies, etc. Honestly, I wouldn’t be disappointed in getting a potato because I love mashed potatoes. It’d also be a hilarious gag gift if you stuck googly eyes to it. But if you’re getting me chocolate, keep it sans fruit, thanks.
5. Touch (tactition): when it comes to reducing touch, my favorites are plush throw blankets, slippers, and all those creative wearables like hoodie blankets or footsie blankets. A favorite among autistics include stuffed animals and plushies like the Squishmallows (knock-offs are acceptable so long as they’re soft). I personally have a small collection of tiny plushies to rub on my face.
6. Temperature (thermoception): I dress based on how I feel, not for the weather. My favorite gifts for this include a desk heater and fan. I also joke that my feet control my temperature, so simply putting on a pair of soft, fuzzy socks can have dramatic changes on my entire body. This often includes the sense of touch too, so all blankets and socks must be soft and no itchy tags shall touch me. Also, maybe your autistic doesn’t like their cold, wet hair touching them, in which case, a towel turban is perfect!
7. Pain (nociception): if you buy someone a gift that reduces their daily pain, they’ll love you forever. If your autistic has challenges managing fatigue, perhaps a shower chair! Soft tissue injuries are also very common among us (we run into things a lot), so other gift ideas might include reusable ice or heat packs (like a cute stuffed animal that is microwavable), massage devices, or this new thing called the Body Braid (disclosure: I do not have one, but I saw a review by someone with POTS who’s also hypermobile and they were absolutely raving about it because it helped provide support).
8. Balance (equilibrioception): when your vestibular sensory system is on the fritz, a way to calm it down is through swinging. Imagine yourself as a compass needing to be recalibrated with gravity. Sensory swings can help the body identify its internal map of “self” in space with respect to gravity. In our home, we have this indoor frame and this sensory swing for our kid (complete with these to cushion the poles when she becomes sensory seeking). As an adult, I use a rocking chair.
9. Body awareness (proprioception): closely linked with equilibrioception because it too receives data from the vestibular organs, gifts that address that sense can also affect this one. However, this sense also receives data from vision and stretch receptors in the skin, so gifts that attract attention to obstacles or protects against them (table corner covers, contrast strips for stairs) would be helpful.

3. Sensory Seeking Gifts

Perhaps the opposite of avoidant is seeking, and in regards to sensory health, this is where someone is seeking to stimulate a particular sense. We’re talking about the same senses but instead of trying to dampen them, we want to excite them!

1. Eyes (vision): you’re good with just about anything that looks cool from lava lamps, plasma balls, stuff with lazers, etc. Any gift can be visually stimulating from light-up shoes to a handbag with a bright and bold design.
2. Ears (audition): if the gift makes a sound, then it’ll stimulate your auditory sense. Musical instruments, squeaky shoes, singing fish on a wall, whatever!
3. Nose (olfaction): candles are often a go-to gift for the holidays, and also sometimes mistaken as a sensory avoidant gift because neurotypicals use candles to mask a smell (trust me when I say candles are a sensory seeking gift!). Candles also stimulate vision with a pretty flame that flickers. Consider foods like coffee and chocolate with their potent smells.
4. Taste (gustation): some autistics like spicey foods, I am not one of them. Wrap a bottle of hot sauce and call it a night.
5. Touch (tactition): activating this sense means touching a variety of different surface types or multiple touches at once, sometimes both. This is where fidget and sensory toys come to play like slime, fidget spinners, and fidget poppers. If your autistic also picks their skin, consider filling this sensory need with a gift.
6. Temperature (thermoception): a gift idea could be steel or stone ice cubes (be it for drinks or skin, I don’t need to know)
7. Pain (nociception): yes, some people want/need to feel pain. In which case, I suggest Monopoly or Crocodile Dentist. I jest, but non-suicidal self-injury (NSSI) is a method of pain relief (biting/pinching self when in emotional distress), however those who do it are often ostracized. For this, I recommend a martial art. I personally found excitement when sparring and yes, I enjoyed even getting punched in the face.
8. Balance (equilibrioception): if your system is under stimulated, gifts like a spinning chair (or the classic Sit ‘n Spin for kids), scooter board, sensory swing, or balance beam can help with that.
9. Body awareness (proprioception): gifts to stimulate this sense might include sensory body socks, Pikler triangles/climbing boards, and crash pads (we just let our kid climb on the couch and move cushions around to be her crash pads).